God Schmod

Searching for love, the young man scoffed when it was suggested that Becky Jane and I were meant to be  life partners.  Divine intervention must have created the circumstances for our meeting in a fleeting moment in eternity.  But more importantly, how easily we may have missed each other if God had not ordained our union.  We both were waiting for the right person.  

The skeptical fellow’s response to the counsel of being patient and letting God drop “Mrs. Perfect” from heaven was “God Schmod.”
Fortunately for you, dear followers, the cerebral meandering machine is a perpetual labyrinth of enlightenment.  So, I thought, Schmod is God’s alter ego.  And if God begot Jesus, Schmod spawned Schmesus.  In a moment of cynicism, “Jesus Schmesus” or “God Schmod” could be utilized.  Either one will make the point for a “doubting Thomas.”
Scenarios follow that possibly represent the differences between the supernatural alter egos.
God created the heavens and the earth.  Schmod, I assume, created nothing.
God lay me down beside green pasture.  Schmod lay me in the thorns.
God wants us to abide by the Ten Commandments.  Schmod encourages us to break them.
Jesus turns the other cheek.  Schmesus bloodies the nose of the dude who slaps him.
Jesus turns water into wine.  Schmesus turns water into Bud Light.
Jesus would take the twenty dollar bill someone lost, make it into a forty dollar bill and return it.  Schmesus covers it with his shoe, waits until no one is looking, grabs it and buys a new pocketknife.
Jesus would jump in front of the bus to save your life by giving up his own.  Schmesus would throw you under the bus.
God offers eternal life.  Schmod provides decomposition in a box six feet under.
Jesus exhorts the prostitute who has confessed her transgression to go and sin no more.  Schmesus recruits her to his brothel.
Jesus challenges the men who “have no sin” to cast the first stone at the harlot.  Schmesus hurls the first stone.
My prayers are simpler now, “God, if it is your will for me, then open the door wide.  If not, then keep it tightly locked, so through it I may not pass.”  Life is complicated.  Acknowledging greater powers at work in one’s life simplifies the journey.  And God is willing to work with dimwits.
Schmod is pseudo God and offers no grace and favor.  So why do we settle on a lower standard than God’s blessing in our life?  Beats the bajesus out of me (sorry, couldn’t resist using another derisive Jesus term).  But, is that not what we do, mock the source of all good things?
My young friend may dismiss the concept of “what God has brought together…”  And many couplings are the result of a notion that God is no more significant than Schmod.
If you discover, by some odd, divine revelation, that your mate is way out of your league, beyond what you deserve, thank God.  It probably was not Schmod.

About Shane Newbold

Father to four and best friend to Becky Jane for 26 years, Shane Newbold lives life to the fullest birdwatching, fishing, boating and enjoying his family.

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